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JUST YOUR DAILY DOSE OF KUTING.

September 29, 2022
It was a final hell day for this quarter and we're f done! yes! While finalizing things, my baby colleague told me she just realized if she was about to retire here at our agency, she would be together with our other co-workers for all her life. She also told me that almost three-fourths of her day was spent here at the office, so literally be spending most of her life with these people, and it made her think about things. Well, it's true, you will be with them almost all your life, it's why you need to have a healthy working environment, where you are happy by just going to the office, no awkwardness towards other colleagues, just having fun in a day at the office.
Today was a good cheat day, haha I ate a McSpicy burger of McDo!

September 28, 2022
I was so anxious today, and agitated. I need to finish some things at work. And since it is a Wednesday, it is supposed to be a Muay Thai day, but I chose strength training today. I was not in the mood to do some cardio. Work sucks. But the program coach gave me made me think twice to have consecutive strength training days. haha. But it was a progress day! I did chin ups! with a support, tho, but same as my weight heavy kind of support. So, I did 6 reps in 4 sets. Haha Like, I cannot believe it, that I can do it. haha. I also did squats with a barbel. It was a tiring day. I'm so tired.

September 27, 2022
It was kind of a stressful day at work, a lot of to do's since it's already a hell week for the quarter, we need to clean bank balances and such. It sucks. I was so irritable today. Even the slightest sound would make me "aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. I can't even talk to the video call properly since it was so noisy. It also rained so hard today, like a typhoon, but it was just a normal rainy day. I also had strength training today. I did deadlifts 40kls, and a lot more strength. It was a tiring day. I got home tired and just tired. haha. And since it was a fasting day, I had no dinner, yet I was so hungry and all. Q_Q

September 26, 2022
Nothing special today. Haha. I just had my Muay Thai training at night. It was full of cardio. Oh! My coach admired my punches on the second round, he told me "You're really serious on this, huh?" Haha and yes, I also admired myself, I can see my improvements, I can do the abs workout and core workout easily that before. The up-down sets, whew! I can do straight 30! The last time, I can't even do straight 3 counts! I got home super late again. Dinner was scrambled eggs and kimchi! nomnom.
And, also, I was introduced to a game entitled "The Last of Us", it was a sad game, especially the first part. I'll prolly watch the cut scenes, because I know I can't finished the game if i'll play it. haha

September 25, 2022
I just had a 16-hour sleep, how was that? haha. It was supposed to be a nap, yet I woke up 16 hours later. It was a restful sleep tho. And I woke up earlier, 6AM to be exact. So I just folded the laundry I had yesterday, and fix the house with the yesterday's mess. I also had some overthinking and all. Yes, haha I also had a big breakfast, and I studied one chapter on my online course. And I was happy, I got to have chika and watched movie while working out. We watched a movie titled The Art of Self-Defense. It was tagged as comedy, yet... you know, you should watch it. It's a nice movie. haha. Yesterday was a short yet fun day.

September 24, 2022
So, today, I had a very busy day planned ahead. Tho, I woke up at 9am, I guess. Prepped for the day, and when I just finished my sun block, the rain poured heavily, like wtf, what? haha But that didn't stopped my. I got out, with my cutie umbrella. Good thing I had my rubber shoes on, so no worries on being wet by water puddles.
First thing on my list today was to get a hair cut. I got my full bangs on again! Haha, hopefully I won't regret this. But I think that haircutter didn't know how to cut full bangs, it's kinda awkward and not balance.
After getting my hair cut, I got to go to a mall, I was looking for a yarn. Yes, I do crochets, too! I was looking for a yarn good for a water bottle sleeve. I know I saw it somewhere, but I cannot figure out where I found those kind of yarns. When I can't find it, I got to go find lunch. And when I didn't know where to eat? I had gone to a buffet haha Alone in a table of six. Yes. Just alone. I grilled pork liver, chicken meat, and pork fats. I also got a soup, hot and spicy soup but I cannot taste the spiciness on it. haha. And I got Korean chicken, too. And some desserts, a choco jelly and an ice cream!
I also got to shopped something, I got a gym bag and some workout clothes, and a lifting gloves.
When I got home, I delivered my dirty clothes in a laundry shop where I had some interesting conversation with a 71-year-old woman. Yes! She's 71-years-old, yet she still feels good! No illnesses and all. She feels amazing! And she also shared she had no kids, no husband, she doesn't have her own family, but she's still happy. She have her sister, too. But from her, she wants to have a kid, "what a wonderful thing could be when you have a kid," she said. But she didn't regret a thing, not having a husband. And when I thought about it, it could be my possibility, not having my own family. I know I am still young, I'm still going thirty. But thinking about it, hurts me. I know, I'll just feel this pain, it would definitely goes away, soon.
I got home 4:30PM, and I feel so sleepy. I slept. Hoping for a restful nap.

September 23, 2022
It's Friday! It has been a busy day at work. I got some calls and negotiations going. Chz. ahaha but true, I need to negotiate something. Tho it has been prolonged, we need to talk about it again on Monday. But Friday is sports and wellness day at the office! Today, our plans is to play Badminton! We got at the Sportzone cetner at 3:30PM, and just played. I hate my opponent, he just joined us, a boyfriend of my colleague, he made me run side to side of the f court! haha It has been breathtaking. haha but it was fun. I just played two games since I planned on joining the Muaythai class at 7:30PM.
At Muay Thai, our coach made us do 3 sets of plank with different kinds of variations, shoulder touch, elbow touch, head touch, and everything to touch. haha I just made 2 sets, my body can't take it anymore. My head's throbbing. And I think if I will push my body, I would just black out. So I didn't listen to coach to continue doing it, I just sat down and breath. My punches that night doesn't have any force, too. And I got home super tired. I barely cooked my dinner. You know, this is what sucks at living alone, you have to do it all. Even when you feel tired or sick, you still need to cook your own food. You cannot just rely on food deliveries since food out there, some are not healthy, the fried food and all. So, I got to cook my food. Ate it. And after settling down everything, I slept at 11pm. haha So early, I know.

September 22, 2022
On the second day of fasting, it feels lighter, my body feels lighter, which is good. Later in the afternoon, I worked out with my coach, it was not a heavy workout, just enough to feel good. But since I am on a fast mode, I cannot carry a 7.5kl dumb bell, which was my past weight on shoulder press. I can only carry 5kl today. I also did a lot of plank workout, different variations. Tiring but it was a good day! I break my fast thru eating a bone broth, then steamed Spinach and Brocolli, and a little bit of kimchi! Dinner was good! I am excited for tomorrow night, I will eat popcorn hhahhahah.
Before sleeping, I was scrolling thru the reels, and I found this quote, "“Oscar Wilde said that if you know what you want to be, then you inevitably become it - that is your punishment, but if you never know, then you can be anything. There is a truth to that. We are not nouns, we are verbs. I am not a thing - an actor, a writer - I am a person who does things - I write, I act - and I never know what I am going to do next. I think you can be imprisoned if you think of yourself as a noun.” (Stephen Fry) It got me thinking, like, wtff, yes, it's true, because when you don't know what you really want in life, you do more exploring different things, you grow more unto different fields, you got to live life because you do a lot of things, exciting and amazing things! So, it's not really a bad thing to not know what you want, it's not a depressive thought, in fact, it's a gift. Because, you see, other people who just wants to have a family, just want to be a this something, they all do this things right after college, or after they moved out of their homes, and they would just do these things up until the end of their days. But, us, who doesn't know where to go, we end up to explore more, to discover new things that might suit us well, learn new things, meet new people. We got to live life a little bit more exciting and adventurous. We should be thankful for being like this, but this should push us a little bit more to do things we really want to do. Do spontaneous things if you must! Just do things. Just enjoy life.
side note: I had a little bit rough night, I was soo agitated and angry. Someone stole some time, and I value time so much, which get me into so ugh, hate it.

September 21, 2022
I didn't have a good coffee today. It was just like warm water with a bit of a coffee taste. Well, it was my fault, I didn't check my pantry if I still have enough coffee grounds for today. Too sad I didn't have enough, so it was just warm water, and I cannot just buy from SB since I am on thrift mode and I might screw up my fasting mode, too. That would be the worst. Yes, we are doing long days fast, more than intermittent fasting. We go on days with just warm water. And even on fast mode, I still attended my Muay Thai class this afternoon. It was more on cardio and core workouts today, though our coach taught me a new punch-shield combo. haha It was fun! but tiring. We did planks with shoulder touch, elbow touch, hip touch, knee touch, that while planking! We also did leg raises, and switch foot and jab-straight-hook, and oh my gahd, high knees. haha All that, for 3 sets. It was kinda hell. hahahahah but it was good. After workout, this is the good part on a fast mode, you don't mind what to eat because all you had to take is water! haha It was kind of a dilemma on my part to think what to eat after workout. You know, after being so tired, and exhausted, and you still got to think what to eat. It is really hard to live alone. Anyway, We also took our Pag IBIG Loyalty Card Plus today, and I love my ID picture there, just one shot and I love it. And I am hungry.

September 20, 2022
Remember the topic we had about the possibility that we are living in a simulated world, so I got into a little bit research today before working on my day job. So, I discovered this Youtube video entitled "Top 10 Pieces Of Evidence That Prove We Live In A Simulation." Few things were about Mandela Effect (it's basically remembering something that doesn't match with historical records), Deja Vu (something overly or unpleasantly familiar), among other things. What struck me most is that there is a research about encoding a malware into physical strands of DNA! When this is analyzed by a gene sequencer, the resulting data becomes a program that corrupts the gene sequencing software and just takes control of the computer! How creepy is that! Though this article said that it's still far from being a criminal act, this is still alarming! I only read a few articles, and I might research more about it when I get bored at work.
Another thing, I have this tendency on replying messages from my Messenger days or weeeks after being sent into my inbox, just because I don't like replying at that time. haha So, when I scrolled my inbox early this morning, I just replied to an old classmate from lawschool. Then after some banter with him, he suddenly asked, "How do you get by on the challenges?" So sudden, it got me thinking for a bit... because I just faced them just for it to be finished, gone. In the previous years, challenges really got me anxious and overthinking, but in the past few months, especially from 2019 up to now, I face those challenges head on because I knew, I can always do what it needs to be done. And I don't know how will I say that to him. I just told him to just get by it, finish it, and internalize what the challenge is teaching me. That was a hard question to answer.
Today was a satisfyingly tired day at my gym, too! I got my fourth session of workout with my personal coach today! We did a lot. She taught me how to dealift! I lift about 30kls. She already let me do slow motion mountain climber, elevated pushups, and a lot more. It was a satisfying day!

September 19, 2022
I am on my 3rd week today, to have fun in my gym! Yes! I just enrolled in a gym. My first point on going there was to learn Muay Thai, and then maybe get some workout when things go slow. But then, I also enrolled on myself with a Personal Trainer! We talked a lot about my goals, and her goals on how she would like me to be after the sessions! So the goals are weight loss and muscle gains. I got always excited when we will be having our session because she gave satisfying workouts, tired but you know that feeling, the feeling of being satisfyingly tired? yes! She can give you that feels. So, tomorrow, Sept 20, my 4th session with her, and I am excited to do her workouts! haha.

Today, also, is my 5th session with Muay Thai. We did some box and kicks. I am satisfied with my kicks. haha. And I am getting better on how I punch, too. I am thrilled!

We also watched a movie tonight, Undisputed III: Redemption (third installment of the movie franchise, Undisputed) where Boyka tries to redeem himself after killing his opponent in a match. The movie shows that, with determination and perseverance, you can achieve the things you want, even greater things in life. It's a must watch movie. A must watch franchise as well!

I also had an interesting conversation about it could be a possibility that we are living a world like Matrix, a simulation. How we are controlled by big corporations controls on what we eat, how we act, and everything else. It's so good that you can really rethink how bsht this world is, and just start to live outside the norms of the general population.

Neko